No –the secret to your success
The best thing you could say when you start watching this is ‘NO’, and then tick something off your to do list
I’d be super happy if you did, and if you practice the habits you listen to hear, that should be your goal to.
Because most of us would be more successful if we said no a lot more often.
– No to that extra episode of Yellowstone on Neon
– No to that extra 20mins scrolling the gram before bed
– No to that extra serve of food you have every evening mealtime
So what’s the problem, why do we say yes so much?
Tell me if this sounds like you, I know for sure it sounds like me
You secretly seek approval each time you say yes.
Unfortunately, we derive value from being liked.
We do it for our own reasons, me, I was bullied as a kid so the way I navigated it was to say yes in order to not be picked on.
Because it was ingrained into me at a young age, it became my default response. It’s only through a lot of self-realisation that I was able to identify this and amend it a little.
We’re ridiculously optimistic with how much time we have to do stuff, meaning we over commit, then we realise oopps, we under deliver, then we feel like crap
And so the cycle continues!
Because, when we lack structure when we’re disorganized, we don’t know what we can’t do and we don’t know how much time we don’t have to do it in.
How to fix this
1 – Structure your day
Get a blank piece of paper and write your next three days down.
Map out what time you get up, get to work, get home from work, go to bed.
These are your non-negotiables
Now you have a clearer daily structure to find out where you do/don’t have disposable time.
2 – Say yes, within reason
Now you’ve figured out how much time you have, you can only say yes to the stuff you can fit into the time you found in your daily schedule.
3 – Warm up your NO.
Now, let’s get this out of the way, you’re not being nasty or selfish by saying no.
You’re learning to prioritise you first, so you can help you first, and then be more effective helping those around you.
The classic put your mask on first tip.
4 – Rinse and repeat
I’d say it’s that simple, but it’s not.
There’s no skinny tea or meal replacement shake for this gig.
You’re going to need the mirror to play a part here.
Can you look in it each evening/morning and say you gave saying no your best shot?
So you’re going to have to be consistent, and that takes time, and means a little failure.
But just like learning to walk when you were a kid.
I’m pretty sure you didn’t say to yourself the first time you fell over, this walking business isn’t for me, I’ll give it a miss.
You get the picture.
And if you think you need some help, come and have a chat with me.
I’ll prescribe you a training plan specifically designed to suit your goals, then we’ll see how easily you say no!